No, this isn’t about a spiky-armored ninja that wants to kill some mutated adolescent turtles who also happened to be skilled in ninjutsu.
This is about a machine that shreds anything.
And I mean anything (even feminine products for some odd reason…).
They shove an entire couch in there!
Words cannot describe the magnitude of this thing’s shredding power, so just watch this clip from about 1992 (I say that because the soundtrack is only available on cassette tape and, no, you can’t have that guy’s mustache, especially if you only want to wear it ironically, hipster).
Now, this begs the question: If the uber-shredder can shred anything, could it shred another uber-shredder? I smell a sequelllllll…
What would you like to shred in the ubershredder? A truck full of Star Wars Special Edition DVDs (including the truck)? Maybe Steve Buscemi? The possibilities are endless…