A Male Engineer View on Women [PIC]

This picture of an hazardous materials data sheet on the element known as “Woman” will surely make quite a few of you guys chuckle, while some of our female readers will probably roll their eyes in exasperation at the sight of it. It might be interesting to see something like this made from the other side of the fence. Any female engineer here interested in doing something similar for men?

[Via Picchore]

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70 Responses to A Male Engineer View on Women [PIC]

  1. Am I the only one who agrees with Marilyn? While some may find this humorous, this kind of "humor" still feeds into what people absorb, believe and share about those who are "other". These jokes are old, stereotypical and unoriginal. Real humor requires one to think about what they are saying, not merely regurgitate what they have been fed up to that point. The more we trivialize sexism, the easier it is to ignore real sexism when it occurs, effectively nullifying the strides made by those before us.

    To Joey and James Edwards: I think that if I ever heard someone saying that anywhere near me, I would slap them in the mouth without a second thought. That goes for men and women both.

    • Angie, I agree with you and Marilyn. While I was able to step back and chuckle at this a little bit, my first response was that it is aggravating to know that this is the kind of thinking which still exists in society. A step or two back for feminism every time women are equivocated to "cleaners." Same for the guys' list. Not all men and women fit into a box, right?

      • In my lab of life Andrew, that only tends to excite the less developed of the male element and creates a leg humping parasitic reaction. To avoid this phenomena, a five second remark (no longer than a remote click of time), filters out the most mentally feeble. Now I am wondering why I am bothering with 3rd grade again!

    • It does exist, though im only able to find the textual version.

      HAZARDOUS MATERIALS INFORMATION SHEET

      MATERIALS SAFETY DATA SHEET

      MEN – A CHEMICAL ANALYSIS =====================================================

      ELEMENT: MAN

      SYMBOL: EGO

      DISCOVERER: Eve. Discovered by accident one day when she had a craving for ribs.

      ATOMIC WEIGHT: Accepted as 170 lbs, known to vary from 98 to 360 lbs

      OCCURRENCES: Large quantities in all populated areas. Highly concentrated deposits at all sporting events and areas known as "singles bars". Extremely low quantities can be found in any location where cleaning up is required. (See Women and Slave Labor)

      PHYSICAL PROPERTIES:

      1) Surface often covered with hair — bristly in some areas, soft in others.

      2) Boils when inconvenienced, freezes when faced with Logic & Common Sense.

      3) Melts if treated like a God.

      4) Can cause headaches and severe body aches; handle with extreme caution.

      5) Specimens can be found in various states ranging from deeply sensitive to extremely thick.

      6) Becomes stubborn and unyielding when pressure is applied; yields only when subtlety, subterfuge, flattery are applied.

      CHEMICAL PROPERTIES:

      1) Is repelled by concentrated quantities of precious and semi-precious metals and stones (See Jewelry Store). However, is attracted to small quantities of these when viewed worn against the skin of a woman. It is believed woman's skin combines with the aforementioned to create a highly magnetic attraction for this element.

      2) May explode spontaneously if wallet is opened.

      3) Requires copious quantities of substances known as attention, reassurance, and stroking.

      4) When saturated with Alcohol will be fairly inert and will repel most other elements.

      5) Is repelled by most household appliances and common household cleansers.

      6) Is repelled by small children clothed in diapers, particularly those of the malodorous variety.

      7) Is rendered non-functional when confronted with the items in #5 & #6.

      8. Is neutral to common courtesy and fairness.

      9) Is impervious to embarrassment.

      10) Most powerful embittering and aggravating agent known to woman.

      Honestly both of these have been around eons.

  2. Blatant sexist propaganda and not even chuckle funny. I suspect no "engineer" had a hand in its creation. I'm an engineer, and I know a lot of engineers. Engineers think about the practicality of their creations. Even an engineer wanabe would accurately forecast the results of this mode of thinking to result in dying alone after a lifetime of virginity.

  3. Blatant sexist propaganda and not even chuckle funny. I suspect no “engineer” had a hand in its creation. I’m an engineer, and I know a lot of engineers. Engineers think about the practicality of their creations. Even an engineer wanabe would accurately forecast the results of this mode of thinking to result in dying alone after a lifetime of virginity.

    • Wow, really? It was a freaking joke. I’ll give you a dollar and you can go buy yourself a sense of humor!

    • Whoever is flaming Marilyn is an idiot. She’s making a good point and you’re all eating into whatever you’ve been force-fed to believe (especially if you find this new take on an ANCIENT joke to be anywhere near funny – then you really are an idiot).

    • No, really, this sucks. These “jokes” would be moldy as a Lockhorn’s comic 20 years ago. So, yeah, not funny, and stupidly sexist. What’s the redeeming feature here?

    • LOL! :) Hey, I'm a girl and I Loled at the pic.

      Marilyn: Chill out. This is called "Humor." Something similar could be done for guys easily, and I'm sure they would laugh at it.

      Joey: Best comment of ALL TIME!

    • LOL! :) Hey, I’m a girl and I Loled at the pic.

      Marilyn: Chill out. This is called “Humor.” Something similar could be done for guys easily, and I’m sure they would laugh at it.

      Joey: Best comment of ALL TIME!

    • It does exist, though im only able to find the textual version.

      HAZARDOUS MATERIALS INFORMATION SHEET

      MATERIALS SAFETY DATA SHEET
      MEN – A CHEMICAL ANALYSIS =====================================================

      ELEMENT: MAN
      SYMBOL: EGO
      DISCOVERER: Eve. Discovered by accident one day when she had a craving for ribs.

      ATOMIC WEIGHT: Accepted as 170 lbs, known to vary from 98 to 360 lbs

      OCCURRENCES: Large quantities in all populated areas. Highly concentrated deposits at all sporting events and areas known as “singles bars”. Extremely low quantities can be found in any location where cleaning up is required. (See Women and Slave Labor)

      PHYSICAL PROPERTIES:
      1) Surface often covered with hair — bristly in some areas, soft in others.
      2) Boils when inconvenienced, freezes when faced with Logic & Common Sense.
      3) Melts if treated like a God.
      4) Can cause headaches and severe body aches; handle with extreme caution.
      5) Specimens can be found in various states ranging from deeply sensitive to extremely thick.
      6) Becomes stubborn and unyielding when pressure is applied; yields only when subtlety, subterfuge, flattery are applied.

      CHEMICAL PROPERTIES:
      1) Is repelled by concentrated quantities of precious and semi-precious metals and stones (See Jewelry Store). However, is attracted to small quantities of these when viewed worn against the skin of a woman. It is believed woman’s skin combines with the aforementioned to create a highly magnetic attraction for this element.
      2) May explode spontaneously if wallet is opened.
      3) Requires copious quantities of substances known as attention, reassurance, and stroking.
      4) When saturated with Alcohol will be fairly inert and will repel most other elements.
      5) Is repelled by most household appliances and common household cleansers.
      6) Is repelled by small children clothed in diapers, particularly those of the malodorous variety.
      7) Is rendered non-functional when confronted with the items in #5 & #6.
      8. Is neutral to common courtesy and fairness.
      9) Is impervious to embarrassment.
      10) Most powerful embittering and aggravating agent known to woman.

      Honestly both of these have been around eons.

  4. While I don't find it offensive, I don't find it all that funny either. It's all old material- it would have been funny if they tried to incorporate something new into it. Like the whole sandwich joke.

  5. While I don’t find it offensive, I don’t find it all that funny either. It’s all old material- it would have been funny if they tried to incorporate something new into it. Like the whole sandwich joke.

  6. okay guys… humor, like beauty, is in the eye of the beholder. I found in quite amusing both as a female, and engineer, AND married to a chemist.

  7. okay guys… humor, like beauty, is in the eye of the beholder. I found in quite amusing both as a female, and engineer, AND married to a chemist.

  8. Am I the only one who agrees with Marilyn? While some may find this humorous, this kind of “humor” still feeds into what people absorb, believe and share about those who are “other”. These jokes are old, stereotypical and unoriginal. Real humor requires one to think about what they are saying, not merely regurgitate what they have been fed up to that point. The more we trivialize sexism, the easier it is to ignore real sexism when it occurs, effectively nullifying the strides made by those before us.
    To Joey and James Edwards: I think that if I ever heard someone saying that anywhere near me, I would slap them in the mouth without a second thought. That goes for men and women both.

    • Angie, I agree with you and Marilyn. While I was able to step back and chuckle at this a little bit, my first response was that it is aggravating to know that this is the kind of thinking which still exists in society. A step or two back for feminism every time women are equivocated to “cleaners.” Same for the guys’ list. Not all men and women fit into a box, right?

    • Re: “”Am I the only one who agrees with Marilyn?”:”” yes you are for… it’s a joke you twit!

  9. Good point Angie. While it may be funny at first it’s just ignorant to think it doesn’t hold a little truth.

  10. Angie and Marilyn need to shut their pie-holes and get back to the kitchen. It's humor. If you don't like it, don't read it.

    • hm, wish I could edit a comment. In any case, I was going to add that maybe we all need to step back and evaluate what we find funny and think about its implications to our state of being.

  11. Angie and Marilyn need to shut their pie-holes and get back to the kitchen. It’s humor. If you don’t like it, don’t read it.

    • hm, wish I could edit a comment. In any case, I was going to add that maybe we all need to step back and evaluate what we find funny and think about its implications to our state of being.

  12. Things like this just make me wonder if people actually act like/ believe this sort of thing. Like are there really women out there that spend all their man's money and expect jewelry all the time? I don't know any, personally. And if there are plenty, and these are bad things, surely, then who is allowing this sort of thing to continue and why?

  13. Things like this just make me wonder if people actually act like/ believe this sort of thing. Like are there really women out there that spend all their man’s money and expect jewelry all the time? I don’t know any, personally. And if there are plenty, and these are bad things, surely, then who is allowing this sort of thing to continue and why?

  14. lol sandwich. anyway for those that are offended did it ever occur to you to stop reading? i mean was it a deer in the headlights moment? are you gluttons for punishment? and if the readers that found it funny (as well as the comments) are sexist, do you think voicing an online opinion is going to change attitudes? also please not that the real sexist males are the ones you sit with each day that never tell you or let on that their fondest wish is for you to leave the lab and get back in the kitchen. as for the rest of us, eh its whatever.

  15. lol sandwich. anyway for those that are offended did it ever occur to you to stop reading? i mean was it a deer in the headlights moment? are you gluttons for punishment? and if the readers that found it funny (as well as the comments) are sexist, do you think voicing an online opinion is going to change attitudes? also please not that the real sexist males are the ones you sit with each day that never tell you or let on that their fondest wish is for you to leave the lab and get back in the kitchen. as for the rest of us, eh its whatever.

  16. Wait, hang on – a question for those of you who thought this was funny. You thought so because women are always made up/ there to clean the house for men/ jealous, money-grubbing and volatile?

    You thought this was funny?

  17. Wait, hang on – a question for those of you who thought this was funny. You thought so because women are always made up/ there to clean the house for men/ jealous, money-grubbing and volatile?

    You thought this was funny?

  18. Has anyone ever heard of the book "Female Chauvinist Pigs" by Ariel Levy? Chauvinism is the new feminism, in which women are brainwashed into thinking that this idea of selling themselves is just what women *should* do to get ahead. And there's no room for women who act rationally, as we are all, regrettably, expected to act irrationally because of stupid stereotypes like this.

    Here's the wiki on the book: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Female_Chauvinist_Pi

    Oh, and real feminism isn't about hating men! It's about bringing about equality for everyone through social activism without dis-empowering any other group (and this includes males).

  19. How to achieve the best female orgasm….

    Yeah, who cares? ;o)

    More seriously I think the feminist line has gone full circle. It seems despite the freedoms and choices gained by their predecessors, if they can't win X-factor many girls wish to be WAGS and live off some wealthy guy.

    There aren't that many wealthy guys to go round. Don't have to look far these days to find some guy bled almost to poverty because of an ex… It's unequal world.

    Question:- Who commits the most domestic violence, men or women? The answer will surprise you.

  20. How to achieve the best female orgasm….

    Yeah, who cares? ;o)

    More seriously I think the feminist line has gone full circle. It seems despite the freedoms and choices gained by their predecessors, if they can’t win X-factor many girls wish to be WAGS and live off some wealthy guy.

    There aren’t that many wealthy guys to go round. Don’t have to look far these days to find some guy bled almost to poverty because of an ex… It’s unequal world.

    Question:- Who commits the most domestic violence, men or women? The answer will surprise you.

  21. Q: How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb?

    A: Feminists can't change anything!

    Husband: Want a quickie?

    Wife: As opposed to what?

    These things are no more than jokes, people shouldn't read into them too much. Even the most innocent of jokes are probably going to offend someone.. Think of the cartoonist who portrayed Mohammed, it was only a joke and he was killed for it.. Should you really have to fear for your life if someone can't see past the innocence of a joke? No matter if it is the most offensive, racist, sexist, ageist, anti-cultural joke ever heard by humanity, it has to be understood for what it is. If people reacted violently or drastically to 'said' joke, then I think it is down to these individuals to reevaluate themselves, and ask why they are getting so worked by up by such a joke?

    It would be naive and unrealistic to hope that all people would think this way but hey it's just my take on things. Roll on the backlashings

  22. Q: How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb?
    A: Feminists can’t change anything!

    Husband: Want a quickie?
    Wife: As opposed to what?

    These things are no more than jokes, people shouldn’t read into them too much. Even the most innocent of jokes are probably going to offend someone.. Think of the cartoonist who portrayed Mohammed, it was only a joke and he was killed for it.. Should you really have to fear for your life if someone can’t see past the innocence of a joke? No matter if it is the most offensive, racist, sexist, ageist, anti-cultural joke ever heard by humanity, it has to be understood for what it is. If people reacted violently or drastically to ‘said’ joke, then I think it is down to these individuals to reevaluate themselves, and ask why they are getting so worked by up by such a joke?

    It would be naive and unrealistic to hope that all people would think this way but hey it’s just my take on things. Roll on the backlashings

  23. I found this funny. I found the female perspective one funny as well–thank you Aelon for putting it up. But I can also see where some of the commenter are coming from. And if you've never met girls who just want to marry a rich guy, then you didn't pay enough attention in highschool.

  24. I found this funny. I found the female perspective one funny as well–thank you Aelon for putting it up. But I can also see where some of the commenter are coming from. And if you’ve never met girls who just want to marry a rich guy, then you didn’t pay enough attention in highschool.

  25. Has anyone ever heard of the book "Female Chauvinist Pigs" by Ariel Levy? Chauvinism is the new feminism, in which women are brainwashed into thinking that this idea of selling themselves is just what women *should* do to get ahead. And there's no room for women who act rationally, as we are all, regrettably, expected to act irrationally because of stupid stereotypes like this.

    Here's the wiki on the book: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Female_Chauvinist_Pi

    Oh, and real feminism isn't about hating men! It's about bringing about equality for everyone through social activism without dis-empowering any other group (and this includes males).

  26. The humor is in the perpetuation of the stereotype. Just because we laugh at the joke does not indicate that we believe it to be true in our society. The majority of jokes that are any good perpetuate some sort of stereotype, and are typically offensive to a specific group or sect of people. The ability to step back and appreciate the humor in the perpetuation of such antiquated stereotypes indicates that you believe that society as a whole is progressing and evolving. If you have to take every word and every joke that you read on the internet seriously, you probably do belong back in the kitchen.

  27. The humor is in the perpetuation of the stereotype. Just because we laugh at the joke does not indicate that we believe it to be true in our society. The majority of jokes that are any good perpetuate some sort of stereotype, and are typically offensive to a specific group or sect of people. The ability to step back and appreciate the humor in the perpetuation of such antiquated stereotypes indicates that you believe that society as a whole is progressing and evolving. If you have to take every word and every joke that you read on the internet seriously, you probably do belong back in the kitchen.

  28. For the record, I do agree with Marilyn…to a point. There is no reason that this can't be funny, even if the humor is dated. (That it still applies says something about both sexs in both examples). However, it is unfair to lump each sex into a single category and I can see how this could be insulting to someones intelligence. It's just a joke though. Geting twisted up about it is only making you as an individual more upset. If we treat people as individuals, then this joke doesn't matter. We are all, after all, individuals. Categories only help us identify large groups of entities by smiliarities. Hence the joke. Look, you can do this one of two ways. You can laugh about it, or you can cry about it. Words to live by.

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