The Emperor: The ultimate geek workstation

Fellow geeks, get ready to start hard-core lusting about what I’m going to show you. Meet “The Emperor”:

Emperor Workstation

Yes, I know, the thing looks like some kind of imperial control station coming right out of a Star Wars movie, but if you look closely, you’ll notice it’s been designed to look like a scorpion’s tail. The geek in me refuses to admit the resemblance, though!

The Emperor features three widescreen monitors, THX Dolby surround sound, air filtering, light therapy, a Web cam, battery backup and many other things to help you fantasize about being a tyrannical army commander controlling a galaxy takeover.

NovelQuest, the company behind the device, will release full specs and price on July 24. Geeks, be ready to cry over your keyboard, because I’m fairly sure most of you won’t be able to afford it!

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51 Responses to The Emperor: The ultimate geek workstation

  1. Oh and by the way, The Emperor comes in "Mac" or "PC" flavor… so no need to whine about your favorite OS not being supported. :)

  2. Oh and by the way, The Emperor comes in “Mac” or “PC” flavor… so no need to whine about your favorite OS not being supported. :)

  3. It has one major design flaw. Anyone that would actually be interested in such a monstrosity would be too fat to fit.

  4. It has one major design flaw. Anyone that would actually be interested in such a monstrosity would be too fat to fit.

  5. Hideous! Looks like the machine Banner was irradiated by, in the old Hulk TV Series. "Don't make me angry, Mr McGee. You wouldn't like me when I'm angry…."

  6. Hideous! Looks like the machine Banner was irradiated by, in the old Hulk TV Series. “Don’t make me angry, Mr McGee. You wouldn’t like me when I’m angry….”

  7. I think I´ll buy it!!! If the price is lower than 2000$ if not… I´ll cry over my keyboard :(

    • well considering a half way decent computer is around 1200 dollars now WITHOUT a monitor, i think this sucker will be well over $5,000

  8. I think I´ll buy it!!! If the price is lower than 2000$ if not… I´ll cry over my keyboard :(

    • well considering a half way decent computer is around 1200 dollars now WITHOUT a monitor, i think this sucker will be well over $5,000

  9. well, my keyboard doesn't work anymore, it's way to wet. Yes, I cried my keyboard to death, because my budget is very low, I have 1 crt monitor! The only thing that is more "geekyer" then a normal computer, is a Razer gamingmouse, well, I want a Philips amBX, a EDimension 3D glasses, etc. but i can't afford it, well, after my birthday I got those glasses, but not this thing!. Well, this thing is awesome, maby I can get it for 5 dollars if i live in 2080! But then are 3 flatscreen monitors worthless, because a glasses-less 3D screen just came out from Philips!

  10. well, my keyboard doesn’t work anymore, it’s way to wet. Yes, I cried my keyboard to death, because my budget is very low, I have 1 crt monitor! The only thing that is more “geekyer” then a normal computer, is a Razer gamingmouse, well, I want a Philips amBX, a EDimension 3D glasses, etc. but i can’t afford it, well, after my birthday I got those glasses, but not this thing!. Well, this thing is awesome, maby I can get it for 5 dollars if i live in 2080! But then are 3 flatscreen monitors worthless, because a glasses-less 3D screen just came out from Philips!

    • If that were so, then this contraption would be a deathtrap! No geek would ever come off this thing once he's on it. LOL

    • If that were so, then this contraption would be a deathtrap! No geek would ever come off this thing once he’s on it. LOL

  11. 8001 Emperor Workstation (standard black/WindowsPC ) $ 39,950.00

    there you go straight from the website F*** that!

  12. 8001 Emperor Workstation (standard black/WindowsPC ) $ 39,950.00

    there you go straight from the website F*** that!

  13. 8001 Emperor Workstation (standard black/WindowsPC ) $ 39,950.00

    there you go straight from the website F*** that!

  14. do you know how many putes and accessories you can buy for 40 g’s??? i mean to hell with the workstation…. collect systems and accessories then build your own station (scorpion tail look alike or not) it’ll be personalized and you can add the toilet and serving trays… the homies’ll love it :)

  15. do you know how many putes and accessories you can buy for 40 g’s??? i mean to hell with the workstation…. collect systems and accessories then build your own station (scorpion tail look alike or not) it’ll be personalized and you can add the toilet and serving trays… the homies’ll love it :)

  16. do you know how many putes and accessories you can buy for 40 g's??? i mean to hell with the workstation…. collect systems and accessories then build your own station (scorpion tail look alike or not) it'll be personalized and you can add the toilet and serving trays… the homies'll love it :)

  17. The looks are great, however three tiny monitors would be a downgrade for me. Same with the chair over the Embody.