I am a bit of a nut for business cards – I normally change mine on a regular basis – and so I fell off my chair laughing when Burt Flaxton posted an old business card on Reddit which has to go down as one of the best ones ever invented. Check it out:

[Via Reddit]
If even half, nay, even a quarter, of those things I could honestly say, I would conisder myself a man. Him, though? He’s a true Man’s Man!
Nice….. I used to have one that announced, among other things:
Virgins Deflowered; Reputations Ruined; Relatives Embarrassed
"Just fulfilling the prophecy of all the other kid's parents by becoming
what was expected of me…..A Bad Influence! "
He doesn't normally drink beer. But when he does…
Thankyou, sir, for bringing a touch of troll-class to these comments.
Greatly Appreciated
Note the (SS) – he is Qualified in Submarines. Honor our veterans today, on Veteran's Day.
He's also a Torpedoman Senior Chief…that's pretty badass right there. Hooyah shipmate