This Weekend on Syfy: Tiffany vs. Debbie Gibson

Giant snakes. Giant alligators. Eighties pop stars in hair-pulling cat fights. Oh, SyFy, never change.

Airing this Saturday at 9 EST is Mega Python vs. Gatoroid, a monster movie romp through the Florida everglades pitting an animal rights advocate (Debbie) against a park ranger (Tiffany) and a bunch of oversized reptiles.

For those of you who don’t remember, Debbie Gibson was the adorable, crimp-haired singer bopping around in malls in the mid-eighties. Tiffany was the other adorable, crimp-haired singer bopping around in malls in the mid-eighties. Listen to “Electric Youth” or “I Think We’re Alone Now” to remind yourself. You also might remember Gibson from Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus. I guess her appearance was so successful that SyFy decided that eighties pop stars are the secret ingredient to VERSUS movies.

Here are some of my suggestions for future SyFy projects:

• Gargantua-Tarantula vs. Giganta-Ant, starring MC Hammer and Pat Benatar
• Humungo-Turtle vs. Ultra-Flea, starring Gloria Estevan and George Michael
• Hungry Caterpillar vs. Big Bad Butterfly, starring Paula Abdul and Bon Jovi
• Mucho-Frog vs. Massive Salamander, starring Jordan Knight and Madonna

Do you guys have any more ideas? Leave them in the comments, if you dare to share… clearly there is money to be made here.