Acronym of the Week – HANGUP

By Mark O’Neill
Contributing Writer, [GAS]

Normally my eyes would totally pass by this story as the debate has been going on for ages but the acronym is worth a post in itself.

Just as the US airlines are preparing to let people finally use cellphones on planes, Congress is preparing to be the usual spoilsports and pass a law preventing people from doing just that. But to add to their fun, they need a cool sounding name for their bill. They can’t call it the “let’s stop people using their cellphones on planes so we can be all smug about it” bill. No, that would be too boring. So they decided on the “HANGUP” bill and HANGUP stands for “Halting Airplane Noise to Give Us Peace” (rocking eh?).

So you can rest assured that your hard worked for tax dollars are going towards cool sounding acronyms! You can all sit around the dinner table and when your children say to you “Mom…Dad…..what’s Congress doing today?”, you can reply “they’re working on the HANGUP bill!”.  Yeah baby!

I mean, how do they come up with names like this? Does Nancy Pelosi have a sweat shop behind that big American flag in the chamber with people feverishly working out words to go with letters that she gives them? Does she go behind the flag and shout “OK people we now have a BALONEY bill! Think of words that can go with the word BALONEY! If you don’t have anything in 30 minutes, you’re all deported back to wherever you came from!  Chop! Chop!”

Seriously, HANGUP?  Come on, enough with the stupid acronyms and let’s pass some serious laws for a change. We don’t need this HANGUP law – or do you really want a law banning cellphone use on planes?