Apple’s Brainwashing Techniques

Ladies and Gentlegeeks, let me present you, the incredible, amazing, awesome Apple Distortion Field. Let the brainwashing begin:

All these extracts were taken from Apple’s September 09 keynote. If you weren’t an Apple fanboy/girl before, chances are you’ve just been converted.

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29 Responses to Apple’s Brainwashing Techniques

  1. Gorgeous.

    And if it was Steve Ballmer and other Microsoft cronies calling their products "amazing, awesome, great" over and over, we'd just laugh.

    (Yes, I have been assimilated.)

  2. Gorgeous.

    And if it was Steve Ballmer and other Microsoft cronies calling their products “amazing, awesome, great” over and over, we’d just laugh.

    (Yes, I have been assimilated.)

    • Why the hostility?

      They're trying to sell products. Why should they be neutral?

      Every single company in the world tries to make their products out to be something you can't or shouldn't live without.

      So what if they exaggerate a little? It's not called dickheadedness, it's just marketting.

      And Apple are obviously masters of it, as this video and their massive amounts of sales show.

      Yes, Microsoft might have a bigger market share in the OS market, but I'm willing to bet that Apple beats (or at least comes close to beating) all of the actual consumer hardware manufacturers/vendors such as Dell, HP, etc. Which is no small feat.

      • Yeah, well saying something is great over and over again doesnt make me think its great, im a sales person and i sell my products by pointing the good points out, not shove a load of greatness shit on my customer's face

    • Why the hostility?

      They’re trying to sell products. Why should they be neutral?

      Every single company in the world tries to make their products out to be something you can’t or shouldn’t live without.

      So what if they exaggerate a little? It’s not called dickheadedness, it’s just marketting.

      And Apple are obviously masters of it, as this video and their massive amounts of sales show.

      Yes, Microsoft might have a bigger market share in the OS market, but I’m willing to bet that Apple beats (or at least comes close to beating) all of the actual consumer hardware manufacturers/vendors such as Dell, HP, etc. Which is no small feat.

    • Why the hostility?

      They’re trying to sell products. Why should they be neutral?

      Every single company in the world tries to make their products out to be something you can’t or shouldn’t live without.

      So what if they exaggerate a little? It’s not called dickheadedness, it’s just marketting.

      And Apple are obviously masters of it, as this video and their massive amounts of sales show.

      Yes, Microsoft might have a bigger market share in the OS market, but I’m willing to bet that Apple beats (or at least comes close to beating) all of the actual consumer hardware manufacturers/vendors such as Dell, HP, etc. Which is no small feat.

      • Yeah, well saying something is great over and over again doesnt make me think its great, im a sales person and i sell my products by pointing the good points out, not shove a load of greatness shit on my customer’s face

    • Why the hostility?

      They’re trying to sell products. Why should they be neutral?

      Every single company in the world tries to make their products out to be something you can’t or shouldn’t live without.

      So what if they exaggerate a little? It’s not called dickheadedness, it’s just marketting.

      And Apple are obviously masters of it, as this video and their massive amounts of sales show.

      Yes, Microsoft might have a bigger market share in the OS market, but I’m willing to bet that Apple beats (or at least comes close to beating) all of the actual consumer hardware manufacturers/vendors such as Dell, HP, etc. Which is no small feat.

  3. I thought it was funny. But honestly, what are we supposed to expect? Steve Jobs to go up on stage and say "Ehh…. It's alright, I guess."

  4. I thought it was funny. But honestly, what are we supposed to expect? Steve Jobs to go up on stage and say “Ehh…. It’s alright, I guess.”

  5. I thought it was funny. But honestly, what are we supposed to expect? Steve Jobs to go up on stage and say “Ehh…. It’s alright, I guess.”

  6. Yeah, amazing and incredible and all that stuff. Doesn't change the fact that, where I live, Apple products are priced right out of the market. To me, that "i" in front of every name is an upside-down "!" warning me that this product is grossly overpriced and I will never buy one.

  7. Yeah, amazing and incredible and all that stuff. Doesn’t change the fact that, where I live, Apple products are priced right out of the market. To me, that “i” in front of every name is an upside-down “!” warning me that this product is grossly overpriced and I will never buy one.