Man Arrested for Lightsaber Assault at Toys R Us


Advertisements

As a massive Star Wars Geek, I cannot lie that when I walk into department stores with automatic doors, I have on occasion pretended that I had the Force and that by the power of my mind alone, these doors flew from my path like Gamorrean Guards.

Now when I go into a Toys R Us, I do make a point of seeing what Star Wars toys… er… collectibles are available. You know… because I have kids.

However the last thing I would think of is to grab a couple of lightsabers and start having it out with complete strangers in the store. I imagine if I did, it would likely play out like this wannabe Sith.

WorstPreviews shares:

Portland police said that 33-year-old David Allen Canterbury went to a local Toys R Us store, grabbed toy “Star Wars” lightsabers in each hand and started to hit customers with them. He then carried the lightsabers outside the store and swung at police. Officers tried to use a Taser to subdue him, but Canterbury successfully deflected one of the wires away.

It doesn’t sound like this guy was all there to begin with, but you have to admire his ability to deflect the incoming taser attack with his lightsaber. The Force is strong in this one!

Well, until he was subdued by the police and put away for his reckless acts.





17 Responses to Man Arrested for Lightsaber Assault at Toys R Us

  1. "when I walk into department stores with automatic doors, I have on occassion pretended that I had the Force"
    Me the same :D I wave my hand, trying to catch the sight of the infrared, now THAT'S something :D

  2. What do you want to bet this guy is going to try to use a jedi mind trick on the judge during his hearing.

  3. Crazy is the path to the Dark Side. Crazy leads to anger, anger leads to light saber attacks, light saber attacks leads to imprisonment.

  4. I just picture him waving his had all controlling like at the Judge and being like "You don't want to hear this case, You want to let me go"

  5. it is obvious that what started out as a contest with another customer on the store's display xbox couldnt be decided by their knowledge of MW3, but by their skills with a lightsaber.

  6. who was the jerk customer who didn't run for their light saber and fight back. must've been jedi children in training. I hear they're a ez to take out by the academy full.

  7. "Junkie: Do you wanna buy some death sticks?
    Obi-Wan Kenobi: You don't want to sell me death sticks.
    Junkie: I don't want to sell you death sticks.
    Obi-wan Kenobi: You want to go home and rethink your life.
    Junkie: I want to go home and rethink my life."

  8. "Officers tried to use a Taser to subdue him, but Canterbury successfully deflected one of the wires away."

    The mental image I get of this is just too awesome for words.

  9. I can tell without photoshop or GIMP, the color photo positive particularly takes too long to load, with my little corei3, so it stops for a slight moment longer every now and then, while the true black and white positive one which loads much quicker but can still be noticed with uber 128-core Core i999 (TM) -esque brain function.