Unbelievable Google suggestions

June 6, 2008 by Mark O'Neill | 27 comments

By Mark O’Neill

One of the features I like the most in Google is the suggestions feature when you are typing in your keywords. But sometimes you come across some really crazy and outrageous suggestions. I mean, look at these ones….

81,300 pages for that?

Yes, many a long and cold night, I have tapped away at Google, searching for the solution to that riddle. But still the answer eludes me….

You don’t need Google to tell you that one! I suppose it all depends on the class of girl you’re dating! Nice girls don’t fart (apparently) while guys just fart away ALL the time…

Now you may say this is just my imagination but Google searchers seem to have an unhealthy obsession with black people!    First with black kids in the cafeteria and now this?    Why are black people black? What the hell? And are there really 51.9 million pages on the subject?

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27 Comments »

Comment by pete
2008-06-06 17:52:49

“Why are all the black kids sitting together in the cafeteria” is a book title (Link to book on amazon.com).

As for the other ones, no idea.

Comment by Jesse
2008-11-06 02:09:07

The one I find baffling is the 704 pages for “Why don’t dildos obey ohm’s law?”

Comment by Jesse
2008-11-06 02:10:04

I’m sorry it’s 4 am here and I haven’t slept for a few days that says diodes not dildos. lol now i feel dumb

(Comments wont nest below this level)
Comment by anon
2008-12-08 00:56:22

well we can see whats on your mind at 4 am

 
 
 
 
Comment by Marc-O
2008-06-07 16:08:09

funny stuff.

I’d argue, about your last question, that google search result numbers are not always a good metric. Especially in this case, with an unquoted question that uses very general terms like black and people. Of course it’s going to have a lot of results. Probably less than one tenth of a percent of these results will actually tackle the issue at hand.

Comment by Rydian
2008-06-07 17:57:35

I have to agree. These searches aren’t being done for an exact phrase. They’re being done for a series of short, common keywords, so you’re bound to get odd results.

Good laugh, though.

 
 
Comment by Scot
2008-06-08 09:45:23

I was coming here to let you know about the book title but I see someone beat me to it. It’s actually a great book.

 
Comment by Kevin
2008-06-08 23:14:34

Regarding the 52 million results for [why are black people black], it’s because unless the query is in quotes it just matches words, so saying ‘black’ twice is redundant. This is actually just saying there are 52 million pages that have the words ‘why’ ‘are’ ‘black’ and ‘people’ in them.

The search for ["why are black people black"] yields only 7 thousand results, not 52 million.

 
Comment by BelchSpeak
2008-06-09 06:59:35

I have noted that the suggestion list is fluid based on ever changing inputs by the jillions of google users. The suggested topics highlighted are already missing from my list.

But awesome article, and thanks for the laughs!

 
Comment by Mazri
2008-06-09 09:16:25

Very funny and intesting stuff about google. Is it true?

Comment by Kiltak
2008-06-09 12:41:56

True.. but only in part, these results are generated using certain stats.. since these stats evolve all the time, typing certain queries will bring you different results at certain points of the day…

You often end up with stuff even MORE hilarious than what we listed here.

 
 
Comment by Ashley
2008-06-11 04:11:37

This is a crazy Post Keep…..This is so true

 
Comment by Tim
2008-06-12 08:26:03

I use the Google search plugin for Firefox, and when I type in “Why are B” the first result is “Why are black people more athletic?”

 
Comment by Rhea - Google Fan
2008-06-12 16:58:10

I like this post! A few people hate Google suggests, but this makes it worthwhile sometimes eh? wondering what other people are searching. Cool

 
Comment by jad
2008-06-13 02:29:21

i like those suggestion most of them are funny :D

 
Comment by Milander
2008-06-13 03:41:37

Well, while the questions may seem to be stupid or just plain dumb, for many people the fact that you can anonomously ask a question has a great attraction. Why are black people black? I can imagine a 12 year old asking that, maybe it is part of a science project on skin! Do dogs have a belly button? Can you see it? No, of course they have one but to a young teen it may not be so obvious. The numbers of people looking at or searching for that information is a bit odd but hey! Google is the number one search engine.

Have you never thought about things that may be obvious to others but unexplainable to yourself… Why is the sky blue? Why does the sea have waves? Why is there snow at the poles? etc

Give people a break. No one knows all the answers.

 
Comment by Dwayne Charrington
2008-06-16 15:36:13

Haha. That made me laugh, I’m officially a geek now. My favourite question “Why are black people black?” completely legit question right? This post made me laugh though, nice work.

Dwayne Charrington.
Thricescene.com

 
Comment by Morad
2008-06-17 06:25:22

The first one is the title of a book dude !!!!!

 
Comment by sir jorge of culver
2008-06-19 20:42:53

i give it a thumbs up.

 
Comment by lahma
2008-06-20 05:59:10

How are the suggestions chosen to the list? I mean, what if someone types “FIRSTNAME LASTNAME IS IDIOT HAHAHAHA” and then it shows up at suggestions? :D You could use it to illegal purposes even. Scary.

 
Comment by Robotguy4
2008-07-08 05:41:55

I bet I know why black people show up so much. One word: 4chan.

 
Comment by B
2008-09-18 10:37:59

I actually just stumbled upon this. It’s a fun little game. You can start with something like ‘How’ or ‘How to’ and then add an ‘a’ and go all the way down the alphabet. There’s something a little off the wall in each list. With ‘e’ for instance, the first result for me was ‘how to eat a girl out.’
‘c’ you’ll see ‘how to commit suicide.’
‘k’ you’ll see ‘how to kill yourself.’
I also saw the part about black people and thought it was funny so just typed ‘why are black.’ Being a black guy I found it hilarious that at the bottom, one of the suggestions was ‘why are black people so loud.’ LOL!

 
Comment by veronica
2008-09-28 21:11:02

I got why are women crazy, why are white people so racist, why are jews so hated, and why are some women taking viagra.
also when i just type why, the first result is why so serious.

 
Comment by norman
2008-11-04 12:58:07

My daughter asked me “do trees have mums”

 
Comment by Natalie
2008-11-05 12:10:32

Lol, brilliant.

 
Comment by Joseph
2008-11-11 09:22:29

Funniest thing I’ve read in a long time, literally rolling around with laughter

 
Comment by nektax
2008-11-25 08:54:21

it depends on the popularity of the phrase. if the same phrase was entered for i.e. million times, it will be picked up and suggested to you automatically to save your time. Google has no prejudice, only numbers.

 
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